Tuesday, February 12, 2013

What does the Bible teach about Sex? (2/4) - by Ola Joseph Kolawole

(Ed. note) I would like to start by suggesting that you read through the previous post here, if you haven't done so already. In this post, we build on the foundation we have established here - and delve into what the bible teaches about sex...


#1: What is sex?
Forget what the dictionary says. Sex is an ACT OF WORSHIP created by God to bring physical pleasure, ‘soulish’ oneness, spiritual adoration, and for reproduction and continuity of human life. Three major purposes:
1. It is a physical connection for pleasure.
2. It is a seal upon the covenant of marriage.
3. It is a means for reproduction.
Sex involves the three parts of the human being, the spirit, soul, and body – all at the same time!

#2: God created sex—pure and true!
In my experience as a believer and through fellowship with the Holy Spirit, I have come to discover that TRUE SEX is perhaps the highest expression of worship you can give to God. You probably want to read that again. I found that as difficult to type as you might be finding it to ingest.

See, sex is far deeper than we think it to be. As we will see shortly, sex (an act of worship as defined above) is more spiritual and soulish than it is physical or bodily. (Remember, God is SPIRIT and they that worship Him must do so in SPIRIT and in TRUTH - John 4:24). All sexual encounters satisfy the first condition of worshipping God—in spirit—but not all meet the second condition—in truth.
o God created sex, created our bodies to enjoy it fully, and does not frown upon it – except outside the limits he has set by himself. [1 Corinthians 6:13, 18; Songs of Solomon 2:7].
o God wants us to enjoy sex within its context. [Proverbs 5:15-20, Ecclesiastes 9:9, Hebrews 13: 4].
o Sex is good, better with the right person (your lawfully wedded spouse), and best at the right time (after lawful marriage).

#3: You are ‘married’ to whomever you have sex with!
o Biblically, you are not permitted to have sex with more than one person. A man having 'one wife' was in fact a man who had only had sex with one woman.
o In the Bible, it’s not really the wedding that does the ‘joining together’; it is the sex—the welding.
o The Bible makes no distinction between marriage and sex.

Examples below:
o After Abraham slept with Hagar (his servant girl), she also became HIS WIFE. From that point forward, scriptures had to specify when referring to Sarah by using the phrase “...your wife Sarah.” [Gen. 18:9-10, 20:2, 23:19].
o In Genesis 24:67, Rebekah became Isaac’s wife as soon as she was taken to his tent. The real marriage covenant is two people engaging in sexual intercourse.
o Jacob could not return Leah the day after the wedding ceremony – even after realizing he had been tricked – because he had already become one flesh with her. [Genesis 29:23, 27, 30].
o In Genesis 29:21, we see that Jacob, when later demanding for Rachael, asked her father to give her over that ‘I may lie with her’. That is what matters! Sex is what turns Miss. Rachael into Mrs. Jacob—not a golden ring!
o Under the Levitical order, a man who slept with an un-engaged virgin had to marry her; if she was a slave, she could not be disposed of afterwards. [Exodus 22: 16, Deuteronomy. 22:28-29].

It is also interesting to note that one of the first questions asked by judges handling divorce cases is “Was this Marriage consummated?” (i.e. have you had sex?). If yes, the marriage cannot be ANNULLED, there can only be a DIVORCE.

#4: Sex is SPIRITUAL
 “That is why a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and the two will be one. This is a great mystery…” - Ephesians 5:31, 32 GWT.

In every sexual encounter, two things are involved:
o The TANGIBLE—Biological fluids
o The INTANGIBLE—Spirits
If you think your condom can help, think again—can condom block spirits? …LOL

#5: Sex is A COVENANT!
As much as I would have loved to dig this point out from the crevices of Genesis 15:8-10, and verse 17, I will mention it briefly:
o All sexual activity creates a tie between the parties involved.
o It is a covenant sealed by blood (with or without the breaking of the hymen).

#6: Sex is an exchange of personalities!
“Then they are no longer two people, but one. And no one should separate a couple that God has joined together." - Mat 19:6 CEV.

You may notice that couples who have been together for a while begin to resemble each other. This is because there has been a three-fold mixing: Spirits have mixed; Souls have been tied and bodies have communicated with each other deeply!

In Genesis 34:1-3, we read of how Dinah had a sexual encounter with Shechem. Verse 3 describes the aftermath, “and his soul clave unto Dinah the daughter of Jacob, and he loved the damsel, and spake kindly unto the damsel.” What is the point? The female leaves the bed with A PART OF ANOTHER MAN inside of her (in every sense of the word) and vice versa!

I trust that the Spirit of God will expound on these words in your heart. In the next installment of this series, we will discuss why we should follow God’s plan in relation to sex.

God bless you.
Ola Joseph Kolawole

(Ed. note) Series is to be continued with the next update by 7pm tomorrow. Please feel free to share thoughts using the comment boxes below.


  1. Hmmnn, hmmmnn, hmmmnnn, mind- blowing is the perfect word for this piece. It has more than blessed me, it has enlightened me. Khoye mi, there is no better time than this 'season of love' to bring to our understanding; profound truths such as these on what sex is really about. Thank U for sowing ur time and blog as a means to instruct others. God bless u. My own Kola Ola, I could sense ur personality while reading this piece. As usual, your words are deep and pierce through the underlyings of the soul. Thank you for staying with God this far, to be his mouth-piece to this generation. I learnt a whole lot. Sex is God's gift to each person, with an inscription that reads 'DO NOT OPEN UNTIL WEDDING NIGHT'. Lots of love from Tinuke Ogunseitan.

  2. "You may notice that couples who have been together for a while begin to resemble each other. This is because there has been a three-fold mixing: Spirits have mixed; Souls have been tied and bodies have communicated with each other deeply!" - Wow!

    This is an awesome piece. Just happened on this. God bless the author(s).

    1. Definitely agree. when you have sex with someone, you are having a soul-tie with that person.

  3. God bless you brothers. God bless you. I read this just in time! *hot tears* how can I contact either of you directly?